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Once upon a time......


Wile7

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.....pie manufacturing business occupying so much of his time ( *tongue*). One day, the wee welshman decided to........

 

 

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Dave Ardley. White Xflow with Clams

ars est celare artem - That's why I have the Clams 😬

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Sadly (or happily if you are a vegitarian), the little lamb ran away and so dave the Pie Man needed to find something else to put in his pies. He thought long and hard and then suddenly he had an idea; he would use..........

 

Dave Ardley. White Xflow with Clams

ars est celare artem - That's why I have the Clams 😬

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And in climbed Mr Bailey wearing a false beard and long hair wishing so much that he could be like wile7. Sadly, because Ash was such a total wet blanket wimpy skinny pooftah, it was not to be. So, Ash gave in and was chopped up into little bits for the pies......and the 'Bailey Burger' was born.........

 

Dave Ardley. White Xflow with Clams

ars est celare artem - That's why I have the Clams 😬

Updated photos here

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to go wrong when Stinky Dave forgot the vindaloo he'd eaten last night. Puckering his cheeks for a right ripe ripper he let go, followed through and thanked God he had his trousers tucked in his socks. *eek* His mum had told him to do that to stop rats running up his bell-bottoms and biting his knackers. This was the only day he'd followed her advice! *thumbup*

 

Now with ankles swelling in the rancid soup-like fluid he waddled down Usk high street wondering where to off-load...

 

 

 

Having the dents knocked out of the MANGO ORANGE HANDBAG (But at least it hasn't got bl00dy clamshells! *cool*)

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back to the tale -

 

...eventually he decided not to off-load and he thought that it might actually become a talking point and help his sales banter. His first call was the opticians shop in the high street, not an obvious target for selling burgers but Stinky was very........

 

Dry-sumped White Supersprint *smile*

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.......poorly educated and thought the letters "O P T I C I A N" spelt "M A S S A G E".

 

Being a Welsh lad he'd associated having his end away with eating pies, something that had caused some upset to his wife. He stumbled over the step into Boots the Opticians, one of his trouser legs came untucked and.... *eek*

 

Having the dents knocked out of the MANGO ORANGE HANDBAG (But at least it hasn't got bl00dy clamshells! *cool*)

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in Cinderford, where the stench blended with that from the abattoir, allowing Stinky Dave to go undetected as he lay there in a ditch, contemplating the Steak and Ale pie that........ 🤔

 

Having the dents knocked out of the MANGO ORANGE HANDBAG (But at least it hasn't got bl00dy clamshells! *cool*)

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he had just sat on. As Ash Bailey from the Cinderford Tourist Association is always keen to point about, the town boast a smelly abbatoir. Stinky quickly wondered if he could try his luck with some sheep destined for the chop - or indeed chops. They must be so desperate they'll do anything he pondered. Quickly tucking his trouser leg back into his sock he.........

 

Dry-sumped White Supersprint *smile*

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.....reinforced the fact that Bailey was a total wet blanket wimpy skinny pooftah by using a paint can to spray graffiti to that effect on a bus stop before re arming his arse with a warm mushy mix of excrement and tepid liquid before firing it at full force from his 🙆🏻.

 

Stinky made a movement.....The **** hit the fan.....and the bus stop, buildings, sheep, local market, church, primary and secondary schools, hospital, police station, fire brigade HQ - in fact everything within a 3 mile radius of his 🙆🏻

 

"Bu&&er" Stinky sighed just as........

 

Dave Ardley. White Xflow with Clams

ars est celare artem - That's why I have the Clams 😬

Updated photos here

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really go for trhe mother of all bottom burps. So Stinky 'coughing trousers' Dave opened the first bottle of cabbage water and slurped it down. "Yum" he mused, and went forth into the rest of the six pack..........

 

Dave Ardley. White Xflow with Clams

ars est celare artem - That's why I have the Clams 😬

Updated photos here

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